Three mentalities easily cause children to be out of group
Xiao Bin (pseudonym) ‘s voice on the phone was distressed and anxious.
She said that she was not beautiful, and her classmates always laughed at her ugly, did not like to play with her, and even talked to her. Most of them were ridiculing that she did not look good, and some words hurt her pride.
Xiaobin felt that he had very little part in the class and no good friends. He didn’t want to find a friend who could talk to his heart.
Resolving the typical: “Black Peony” was admitted to the First Affiliated High School of China Normal University and heard Xiao Bin’s remarks. Teacher Han Xiuzhen told her the following true story: “Black Peony” is the “nickname” that Xin Xin’s parents gave her because of Xin XinIt’s dark and doesn’t look very good.
However, in the class, Xinxin never inferior herself because she doesn’t look good. She has good grades and outstanding literature and art. She is a good friend with many classmates. In the end, she was admitted to the First Affiliated Middle School of China Normal University.
Expert Tips: Children should be inferior. Parents should praise Teacher Han for analysis. Xiaobin is not confident enough and cannot see her own advantages. When facing classmates, she is always worried that others will make fun of her weaknesses, so she is afraid to get along with others.
In fact, she should find more advantages from herself, look at her own strengths, and do not use her weaknesses and other people’s advantages to explain.
Even if it is a weakness, you must turn it into a strong one, just like a “black peony.”
Mr. Han reminded parents that if children are afraid to associate with others because of their inferiority, they should guide children to actively treat their own shortcomings, objectively and comprehensively understand themselves, give full play to their strengths, and communicate with others with confidence and initiative.
Parents usually praise their children’s weaknesses and exaggerate their advantages from multiple angles.
But for the child’s deficiencies and defects, let him learn to face.
Proud of Dong Dong, a suspect called “vulgar” yesterday, a mother confided to Teacher Han Xiuzhen that her son Dong Dong (pseudonym) was unwilling to deal with classmates and parents.
On weekends, Dong Dong went to the street to buy a book. Mom and Dad said to accompany him. Dong Dong left a sentence “No need” and turned away, leaving his parents face to face.
In the class, Dong Dong was reluctant to talk to her classmates, and only cared about herself.
Dong Dong said that he and his classmates did not have a common language, because the classmates played games online and closed their mouths, and they liked to draw.
In Dong Dong’s eyes, classmates are so vulgar.
Case Counseling: Finding a Common Hobby with Others Teacher Han told Dongdong’s mother that children do not want their parents to accompany them. Parents can find opportunities to ask why.
The child likes to draw. When the parent talks with him, he will talk about certain related topics, raise the child’s interest, let him have something to say, and slowly develop his habits and ability to communicate with others.
Children do not like to communicate with classmates. If it is because of different preferences, parents should enlighten their children. Even if they have different interests, they can still become common hobbies in other aspects or help each other in learning.
Expert Tips: Children are proud and participate in group activities. Many children feel that they are better than others and despise others. They often think of themselves as self-righteous, and do not want to associate with other children.
Pride children are mainly because of their good grades and take this as their advantage. They don’t think it is a feeling of pride.
When children intentionally or unintentionally say “XX learning is awful” at home, parents must pay attention to the child’s tendency to pride.
At this time, you should tell your child that there is a sky outside, and that there are people outside, and you should look at the strengths of others and learn from each other’s strengths.
Most arrogant children can’t stand frustration and are often fragile when facing unsolvable problems.
Parents should allow them to participate in group activities more, and have a pearl-tolerant heart for people and affairs, and should not care about it.
The progress of his performance was envious of Xiaoping (a pseudonym) who passed the third place in the class this time, but no classmate congratulated him on his progress. On the contrary, he heard a lot of rumors.
Some students said that Xiaoping must have seen the test paper secretly when he went to the office, so he did well. Some students said that it must be Xiaoping’s parents gifted the teacher, and the teacher revealed the test questions to him.
Xiaoping was very unhappy. He studied hard and improved his grades, but his classmates saw him that way.
So he was quiet in class and didn’t want to talk to others.
Expert Tips: Teach the children to accept the analysis of the “strong man” Teacher Han Xiuzhen. Jealousy is the most prominent problem that leads to discordant student relationships, and it is also the most harmful mentality.
It is mainly reflected in the following aspects: first, the behavior of stealing classmates’ review materials is the most common; secondly, slander behind the classmates; thirdly, if the classmates have good grades, they suspect that others are not the true level; fourthly, they are unwillingLend materials to classmates.
Facing the child’s jealousy, parents should teach their children to be tolerant, accepting classmates better than themselves, and learning better than themselves.
In fact, parents should tell their children that if their classmates are doing better than themselves, they should not do small moves behind their backs to harm others. Instead, they should treat their classmates as their own participants and motivate themselves to study hard.